My name is saxikath, and I am a geek.
May. 19th, 2004 01:17 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
saxikathSo we had Legends this weekend. It was the first full-length event I'd been to since the fall, since I missed one for Ragtime, and I had a great time (despite the heat on Saturday).
Since I got back, I've sent and read a pile of game-related e-mails, and went to boffer practice/dinner and gabfest last night. And I keep thinking about it. It worries me sometimes that I get so into it. I get nervous that other things I want and need to do will fall by the wayside. They haven't so far, and I don't think they really will, but it concerns me occasionally.
On the other hand, the game is an awful lot of fun, and I find it very refreshing to body and spirit -- much as I do with performing. I was exhausted and brain-dead at the end of last week after two weeks in correlations hell, and by Monday I was bright and energetic and chipper again. Physically tired from the event (and probably five pounds lighter just from water weight!), but mentally alert and emotionally in good spirits.
And (warning: arty fruity stuff ahead) I think I learn some things about myself while I play. Certainly I am more courageous and assertive in game than I am out of game, and I think I begin to see bits of that creeping into my real life, too. Which is a good thing; I have sometimes been too unwilling to speak my mind. Obviously, it's easier to take risks in game, because there are no "real" consequences to those risks. I've had more than one person comment on my in-game bravery, and I'd like to have the confidence to apply it to the real world as well.
I suppose I'm overthinking all this, as usual. I should just play the game and enjoy it, and not worry about the fact that I enjoy it.
Since I got back, I've sent and read a pile of game-related e-mails, and went to boffer practice/dinner and gabfest last night. And I keep thinking about it. It worries me sometimes that I get so into it. I get nervous that other things I want and need to do will fall by the wayside. They haven't so far, and I don't think they really will, but it concerns me occasionally.
On the other hand, the game is an awful lot of fun, and I find it very refreshing to body and spirit -- much as I do with performing. I was exhausted and brain-dead at the end of last week after two weeks in correlations hell, and by Monday I was bright and energetic and chipper again. Physically tired from the event (and probably five pounds lighter just from water weight!), but mentally alert and emotionally in good spirits.
And (warning: arty fruity stuff ahead) I think I learn some things about myself while I play. Certainly I am more courageous and assertive in game than I am out of game, and I think I begin to see bits of that creeping into my real life, too. Which is a good thing; I have sometimes been too unwilling to speak my mind. Obviously, it's easier to take risks in game, because there are no "real" consequences to those risks. I've had more than one person comment on my in-game bravery, and I'd like to have the confidence to apply it to the real world as well.
I suppose I'm overthinking all this, as usual. I should just play the game and enjoy it, and not worry about the fact that I enjoy it.
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Your revelations sound familiar...
Date: 2004-05-19 12:09 pm (UTC)Also, thanks for bday wishes, semicuz o mine-- I was happy and proud to be associated with the events of the day.
no subject
Date: 2004-05-19 08:22 pm (UTC)